Hurt

Have you ever felt sooo hurt that it numbs you from the inside out? Well, that's how I'm feeling right. It's a bad feeling but when you think about hard enough, you realise that no matter what you or say, things will never be the same again.

Well, you can always try to fix it but as the saying goes, once broken, it's considered sold. Sometimes, I don't understand why it so hard to say "I'm sorry..." Maybe it's genetically engineered or wired up that it's just hard to say so. Maybe it's just plain ego. I really don't care what or how it happens, I forgive you but to admit that part of it is his fault...that will never,ever happened.

We are still not talking rationally..just yes, no, maybe...No, I don't want yr money.....I hate this but I can't take it anymore...it's just getting harder and it hurts, terribly.....

How do I begin...

Sometimes, too much of a good thing could possibly result in dissatisfaction. There's always something wrong somewhere, " You can't say things..." "Takboleh cakap baik2 ke...." Those are a few examples of the things that your better half would tell you...if they think they're right, which s all the time....

For example today, waiting for the better half to pick me up from work, no calls, no SMS, no nothing..nada...until about 6pm..so I decided to walk to my mom's house which luckily is quite a distance...hence the song "I walked 500 miles" suddenly came to mind....

And when he finally caught up with me, all that he could say is "Who asked you to walk home?"..not "Are you ok?" Next line of question was " Have I ever not pick you up from work?"..not "Do you need some water?

Well, that's married life....I believed that you can drop dead in front of him and he will just step on you hard....

That's my life......